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Explorations of mind, paths, and life

Labyrinth of Possibility

Posted on October 9, 2010 - Filed Under adventure, beginnings, ceremony, crossroads, fear, feelings, gratitude

A labyrinth is symbolic of the sacred journey inward, providing opportunity to meditate and re-center. The shifts at each turn trigger a shift from left-brain to right-brain, allowing for a dance of the mind that opens one to one’s inner-most knowledge and self. Faced with the Labyrinth at Mountain Valley Center in Otto, NC, I was well aware of my struggle to ask for what I want or need when faced with the opportunity to gain some truth. From my meditative walk, I recognized, at my first steps, a belief that I am somehow unworthy or selfish to ask, and so I simply asked for clarity; clarity in spirit, clarity of purpose, clarity of direction. As I walked I kept my gaze at the immediate path, taking in and absorbing details. I observed the ways in which nature wove itself between the stones, and the brilliant microcosms of life existing between one step and next. Each step offered a densely different landscape. The road, the passage, much like life, sometimes bumpy, sometimes unfamiliar, sometimes smooth, sometimes confusing; like life, a journey with bends and shifts in direction and changes in message.  Sometimes taken with confidence, and sometimes not.

At times, I would pause, finding a small treasure or totem along the way, something I found beautiful; a leaf, golden yellow, with blood red tips and a touch of orange.  I intended to keep it, rubbing it between my fingers as I continued my mantra and walked the Labyrinth. I held on to it, much like the stuff I think gives my journey meaning, and maybe it does for a time… I held on, relieved to have something to do with my hands, so that I didn’t cross them, or tuck them in my pockets. I held on through steps and thoughts, taking in the colors, the texture, the simplicity, the veins, the brilliance, of both the leaf and the path, repeating my mantra, asking… asking… I held on until I entered the sacred center and there, I paused, looking for clarity.  I gazed upon the mementos, the little gifts others had left at the center on a large rock, and I looked at my leaf. The leaf that had occupied my fingers for part of that journey, and although hesitant, I offered it up – willing to let go of old beliefs, old ideas, old and well worn identities, the stuff that has carried me through this journey so far… willing to leave it there for another to see amidst so many others balanced in a pile. I could leave it there, until somewhere my human-ness would call it back and carry it again. Its beauty I could retain in my mind and heart, its purpose served.

I know the answers come when they come, at any place along the journey, so I started back through the labyrinth, slow steps, again taking in the language of nature along that journey… and I wondered, had I really been here before?  The path back unfamiliar again, aside from a few landmarks; a heavy stick across the path, the tree I had to squat under, the stone with “kindness” written on it, but other landmarks were new. How had I not seen the fuzzy black and brown caterpillar on the path, the shiny stone pressed between the moss and sprigs of life? And the mantra back became a conversation, with the truth of my own being…

– What is my purpose? What do I do now?
+ Can you trust that the answer to that will reveal itself when you are there?
– But I am afraid, why am I afraid?
+ What do you fear?
– I don’t know… being alone … my own power…
+ But you are not alone, you know yourself… your power is a gift, the greatest gift to the universe is to use our full potential…
– I am afraid I won’t have enough…
+ You have enough, you always have, and when the illusion carries the idea that you do not have enough, you still do.
– I struggle to trust the world
+ You struggle to trust yourself, Evelyn.
– I know! Why is it so hard?
+It is not hard, just let go of the resistance, follow your innermost voice, it holds all you need to know, all the knowledge of the universe, if you just listen…

And although the conversation continued until I came to the end, and took a final step out of the Labyrinth, I recognized that I am right where I need to be at any given moment, exactly on the path, moving at my pace, with myself. In that journey I get to admire all that exists, the shift in landscape, the turns, and there is never a direction that isn’t moving forward, never a path that isn’t just the path I am to take. I am not selfish for asking for what I want, all I can do is ask, and deeply I can provide what I most need… I am … and I hope I remember all this when I next take a step – each step is moving, each step is living, and all I can do is offer the best of myself throughout this journey.

Comments

One Response to “Labyrinth of Possibility”

  1. mamitaruby on October 10th, 2010 1:46 pm

    So much wisdom, and trust is its soul companion. Trust brings the peace and beauty one find in the sacredness of nature. When I am in Nature I find myself, because there is not needs for answers.
    The riddle of life has one answer, NOW, just that moment because each moment is new to be savor

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